Emotional Intelligence: How To Manage Negative Emotions
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We’re constantly exposed to negative emotions, both in our lives and media. It is easy to develop an emotional deficit due to this exposure.
Emotional intelligence (EI) refers to one's ability to recognize, evaluate, manage, and respond to your own and other people's emotions.
Most of us have heard about it before, but what most don't know is that there are specific strategies for developing their EI.
You can learn how to be more aware and understanding of your own feelings so you're less likely to make decisions based on emotional reasons rather than logical ones.
This is important because we spend a lot of time thinking about things- whether alone or with friends-and then feel bad or guilty for what we decide to do.
We also need to be able to understand why others may be feeling a certain way.
With enough practice, these skills will help you achieve your goals and live a happier life.
Look at your reactions
Most people avoid making changes because they fear how their actions will affect them. They worry about losing praise, of being criticized for changing things, or that they do not know what to do once they have made a decision.
All these fears are natural but unnecessary. The fact is, you will never make a change if you do not feel like it!
If you put in too much effort into avoiding something, you will never start. You need to find an easeful place where you can make small changes, then add more challenges to yourself.
You will also need to recognize when you are experiencing negative emotions and stop trying to distract yourself from them. This could be through talking to someone, taking long walks, doing activities you enjoy, or any number of things.
It may help to understand why you are feeling this way so that you can work on the root cause. For example, if you are angry with somebody, maybe listening to music you like is enough to calm you down. Or if you are worried about something, practicing relaxation techniques can help relax you.
Be honest with yourself
We often times get stuck in our patterns of thinking and behavior because we are not being honest with ourselves. For example, if you’re constantly putting off going to work due to fears of failure, then you will never go into business or fulfill your dreams of becoming an entrepreneur.
By not taking action until all of your doubts have been erased, you are actually creating more doubt and fear. You may also be denying your desire to change things for no reason.
Start by being honest with yourself about what is making you feel insecure or nervous. Is it that job interview that makes you uncomfortable? Or could it be someone else present at the event who does not like you?
Whatever it is, address it directly and try to solve it. If needed, ask others for help so you do not feel isolated. Having support can reduce stress and give you confidence back.
Running away from your problems will only make them worse! No one ever made a success out of people that avoided their issues. Sooner or later, though, you will need to face them.
Seek the help you need
Finding the source of your anger can be tricky, but it is always important to look for the cause of your emotions. It’s easy to get distracted by the intensity of an emotion and forget about potential causes, but understanding why you are feeling a certain way helps you control your reactions.
It also helps you identify what may potentially happen next in order to prevent any negative situations from occurring. For example, if you realize that something made you feel angry, then try to see how much of an effect this thing had on you and whether there were other things you could have done to avoid getting angry.
If you notice signs of emotional distress in someone else, ask if they want to talk about it or if you can do anything to help them relax. Sometimes people don’t take time to themselves until hours later so trying to offer your support will only help them heal faster.
Meditation is an excellent way to develop your emotional intelligence. While some may consider it a form of relaxation, there are many different types of meditation that can actually have powerful benefits.
There are several different styles of mediation you can try. Some people focus exclusively on their breath while others use a word or phrase as their focal point.
No matter what type of meditation you choose, just start with a few minutes each day and see how well you feel after. You will find that the effects last longer than the end the session!
There are also various apps and tools designed specifically to help promote mindfulness and emotional wellness. Try one out for yourself to experience the benefits.
Mindfulness has been shown to reduce stress, improve mood, enhance relationships, and increase quality of life. It’s worth a look if you’d like to try this self-help technique.
Speak with your partner about how to be a better listener
In my experience, when one person in an intimate relationship is not listening to things properly, it often ends up hurting both people involved.
For example, if you do not listen to what makes your other half feel good or confident, then they will try harder and work more hard to make you happy, which can backfire and hurt them even more.
They may keep trying longer than necessary before realizing that their efforts are going unrewarded and therefore stop. This could cause them to end the relationship – something they probably did not intend at the beginning!
By learning how to effectively manage your own emotions, as well as those of others, you will learn how to avoid breaking down relationships. You will also realize that your emotional state at this moment does not matter as much as whether or not you are able to control your next action.
Learn to laugh at yourself
A lot of people get upset with themselves for something they did or said, then immediately start feeling bad about themselves. Before you know it, you have wasted time worrying about what you did.
The best way to stop this is by simply laughing at yourself!
You will find that as you learn how to laugh at yourself, your emotional intelligence will improve. You will also feel happier because you will be able to control your own emotions.
Learn how to laugh at yourself and other people sometimes, but never at money. Money is one of the biggest causes of stress in our lives.
Never worry about having enough money, only give importance to things that matter to you. What matters to you right now may not matter later. Having extra money can make you happy, but only if you use it to fulfill your dreams rather than to buy more stuff.
Become a good reader of body language
A lot of people are a source of internalized negative emotions.
People who make you feel bad about yourself or that you do not seem worthy enough may be making frequent eye contact with you, or may talk about themselves more than you want to listen to.
If they call you out on something, it may not be your fault, but their’s. You can try to teach yourself how to recognize these signs and what things might be causing them for them, but only if you are able to identify your own feelings first.
Become a good reader of body language. Understand why someone is looking away, or at the floor, or whether their voice has changed when they speak to you.
Maybe they were never really in the position to start with? If so, you will know before you even ask if they like you or not.
Seek emotional support when needed
It is important to know how to manage your emotions in order to live a happy life. When you are feeling down, it is helpful to seek out people that make you feel good about yourself and help you push through this difficult time.
Friends, family members, coworkers – no matter what their position is, everyone experiences negative feelings at some points in their lives.
It’s totally normal to get angry or frustrated, but there are ways to handle these feelings in other people so that they don’t affect you too much.
By being aware of the signs of a depressed person, including changes in their behavior, mood, activity level, and thoughts, you can be prepared to offer them appropriate help.
On the other hand, if you notice someone who seems overly enthusiastic or excited, try to determine whether they are over-emphasizing the news they are sharing or if something significant has happened.