How Emotional Intelligence Is Different From Other Intelligences
Success Quarterly is a tech and business blog that focuses on the intersection of Silicon Valley and Hollywood, including technology, business, mobile, entertainment, media, and related topics.
People with high emotional intelligence are not automatically better people than those who are less emotionally intelligent, but they do have something going for them. They know how to use their emotions to help them relate to other people and understand them.
They can identify what traits of theirs may be getting in the way when it comes to interpersonal relationships and they work to fix that by taking time to learn more about empathy and why it is important.
Emotional intelligence has become increasingly important as social media makes it easy to stay connected to others, even if you don’t like or agree with them.
It can make your job easier because of this, but it also raises questions about whether there is an ethical line that gets crossed when someone’s emotions get too strong.
In this article, we will talk about some things that show that emotional intelligence isn’t always good. It can be used to promote harmful behaviors and attitudes.
Differences between emotional intelligence and other intelligence
People with strong social skills are not necessarily good at identifying their own emotions, nor are people who use humor to deal with difficult situations have significant levels of empathy.
Social IQ tests focus more on evaluating how well you can read others and identify if they’re feeling something or not, but few test questions measure your ability to recognize your own feelings.
That's because most theories about EQ emphasize that it is an understanding of yourself and other people, not just knowing what makes someone else feel happy or sad, that leads to higher levels of empathy and intimacy.
You may be very aware of why someone else feels angry, but you wouldn't know why she got upset.
In fact, some studies suggest that being able to put yourself in another person's shoes is a sign of low emotional intelligence.
Ways to improve your emotional intelligence
First, you can’t just learn about emotion by reading books or taking courses — it must be practiced. This means finding situations that require you to use your emotions and practicing them under control.
Practicing mindfulness is an excellent way to do this. You may have heard of meditation before, but there are many types of meditations you can choose from.
A mindfulness practice could be doing yoga, listening to music, looking at plants, or anything else that focuses on only one thing for a set amount of time.
After you have done some short ones, try doing longer ones to see how well you can focus on each one. Some people prefer spending their minutes watching a movie instead of paying attention to something more meaningful.
There are also several apps designed to help you with this. They may make you feel relaxed or calm, which helps you gain more knowledge of the benefits of such relaxation.
How to be more emotional in relationships
In order to maintain an intimate relationship, you must know how to be emotionally intelligent. You cannot expect your partner to show love to you if they do not feel loved themselves.
Most people are not very good at identifying their feelings and this can lead to some pretty messed up situations. Sometimes they will fail to recognize that someone else has hurt them and this may cause them to repeat hurting behaviors.
Other times they might misinterpret a signal as meaning something it does not so they decide it is better to have no relation than one with poor quality. Either way, this isn’t healthy for anyone involved.
There are several ways that we could describe being emotional or emotional intelligence (EI). The most common definition of EI describes it as the ability to identify and manage your emotions.
This seems simple enough, but there are many things that can get in the way. For example, when you go through life thinking that nobody loves you, then it becomes easy to develop limited trust and self-esteem.
When you believe that you are worthless, why would you invest time and energy into anything? Unfortunately, this is what a lot of people think about themselves and this can easily spill over into their relationships.
On the other hand, people who understand their own weaknesses and limitations often work harder to improve themselves. They may also realize that they deserve much better than what they have, which helps them put more effort into finding this out.
Teach people to be emotional
Most experts agree that emotional intelligence is different from other intelligences like logical, verbal, or quantitative reasoning. While all of these are important skills, being able to recognize and manage your emotions is arguably the most crucial.
This isn’t just because strong emotions can motivate you to do things you wouldn’t otherwise — like spend money on something that makes you happy — but also because some things simply cannot be done well when you’re not in control of yourself.
A few examples? Eating foods that you love while someone else calls you fat is easy for me, I come from a place where I am always hungry. But what about you?
Raising children is a process that requires lots of patience and understanding. If you never learn how to regulate your own feelings, you will likely burn out quickly. And even if you don’t, your kids won’t respect you.
Research shows that adolescents who lack empathy are more likely to engage in delinquent behavior and substance abuse later in life. They're also less likely to feel close relationships with others their age, which means they may have fewer friends as adults.
Emotions play an integral role in socialization, so it's very important to learn how to control them. Unfortunately, many teens get this message through no one better than themselves.
I've seen countless stories of teenagers' emotional regulation strategies that seem worthy of a parody video.
Practice being emotional
People with high emotional intelligence are not necessarily good people, nor do they feel emotions all of the time. They may even be able to control their emotion swings for the most part, but that doesn’t make them any less intelligent.
Research shows that there is no link between having higher levels of EQ and being more likely to hurt or mistreat others. In fact, some studies suggest that individuals with lower EQs tend to pull ahead when it comes to acting aggressively towards other people.
So while you might think that someone who has higher EQ can’t handle their own feelings, this isn’t true. Some people simply look at life differently than what we know as “normal.”
Emotions come from internal experiences and beliefs. Someone who is highly emotionally literate will understand that things don’t always go away easily, but they also recognize that things aren’t always perfect either.
They may learn how to deal with frustration better, but that doesn’t mean that they won’t get angry sometimes. Just like anyone else!
However, those individuals will probably talk about their anger and frustrations less frequently because they recognize that wasting energy by getting too worked up only makes matters worse.
Learn to be emotional with others
Many people think that emotional intelligence is similar to other intelligences, like logical or intuitive intelligence. It’s not!
That's because emotional intelligence isn't about having lots of emotions, it's about being able to control your own emotions so you can learn from them.
You're probably already familiar with the term "emotion" as it applies to relationships. When someone does something kind or thoughtful, we get happy and grateful. When they do something hurtful or bad, we get angry. And when they don't do anything, we feel sad.
But what if I told you that most people are only aware of their own personal set of emotions? They may know how to use certain feelings for themselves, but none of them knew how to regulate those same feelings for someone else.
This lack of emotion regulation is one of the biggest things holding us back emotionally.
Be honest with your emotions
Most people are not good at recognizing, understanding and controlling their emotional responses.
This is an important skill to have if you want to do well in life. In fact, there’s a theory called “emotion-intelligence” that says it’s one of the most crucial skills for success in work and other areas of your life.
People who are very intelligent typically show signs of emotion-intelligence. For example, they may be able to recognize what kind of mood someone is in, or how much anger some behavior has made them feel uncomfortable.
They might be able to identify what causes those feelings and whether it’s worth it to try to change them or avoid changing them when possible.
Understand your emotions
A lot of people think that emotional intelligence is the same as other intelligences, such as logical or mathematical intelligence. It’s not!
Emotional intelligence isn’t like mathematics or logic — it’s more like understanding how to understand yourself. You’re probably already pretty good at this, but you may need help figuring out what things make you feel different feelings.
That’s where emotional literacy comes into play. This includes knowing about various types of emotions, recognizing them, and learning how to manage them.
Once you have all these under control, then you can apply them to everyday life. For example, if someone makes you angry, try to recognize the emotion they’ve made you feel, and see whether there’s anything underlying why they might be upset.
You could also ask yourself questions to find out more about what might lie behind their behavior. Does he/she get along with others well? Are they having trouble at work? Or do they seem happy most of the time?
If you're reading this article online, you should head over to http://www.mprnews.