How Emotional Intelligence Can Be Developed
Success Quarterly is a tech and business blog that focuses on the intersection of Silicon Valley and Hollywood, including technology, business, mobile, entertainment, media, and related topics.
Over the past few years, emotional intelligence (or EQ for short) has become one of the most popular leadership theories in the workplace. It looks at how well you control your emotions to determine if someone or something is important to you and why.
This understanding of emotional regulation comes from research that determined people who can regulate their own feelings are more successful than those who cannot. The average person needs help controlling his or her emotions once in a while, so professionals develop special training in this area.
It was noted that these successful individuals had trained themselves to think about their feelings during difficult times. They learned how to recognize and understand their emotions before responding to them.
These strategies have a positive effect on others’ perception of you and increase job performance because they keep you focused on completing your tasks. You will need to be able to identify your emotions before you can work on changing them, however. This article will go into more detail on some ways to improve your EQ.
Relationship between emotional intelligence and happiness
Recent studies show that being emotionally intelligent is linked to greater happiness in your life. It also correlates with lower levels of stress, anxiety, and depression.
Many experts believe that emotional intelligence can be developed through education or training. For example, someone who has learned how to manage their emotions may feel happier than people who have not.
There are several reasons why having more emotional intelligence could make you feel happier. First, it helps you deal better with everyday stresses.
Second, it makes you think about yourself and your place in the world more objectively – without getting too attached to what position you expect others to put you in. This can reduce feelings of jealousy or resentment.
Ways to improve your emotional intelligence
One of the most important things you can do to improve your emotional intelligence is recognize when something is happening that is not good.
This happens when someone does or says something that makes you feel bad, angry, hurt, or discouraged.
You must be able to recognize this type of situation so that you can take action to avoid it in future. And it should always be for a legitimate reason, not because someone else made you feel bad.
It’s easy to get distracted by other thoughts and feelings during times like these, but trying to think about what could have possibly caused this reaction really helps.
That way you can work on avoiding similar situations in the future!
Another thing you can do to improve your emotional intelligence is learn how to manage your emotions.
Many people believe that being strong doesn’t need to include having control over your own emotions.
Practice emotional awareness
A key part of developing your EQ is learning how to recognize and understand your own emotions. You can learn this by practicing self-awareness, which means paying attention to what you are doing, what people around you are doing, and what you are feeling at any given time.
This way of being aware allows you to identify what may be eliciting an emotion or putting someone in a bad mood – something that may not seem important, but could hurt relationships and make it harder for you to enjoy things you love.
By using these tools, you will begin to develop insight into yourself and your behaviors, and eventually into other people.
You’ll also become more conscious of their feelings, and how they feel about you. This helps with interpersonal relations, as well as work and school situations.
Running through our experiences internally can help us figure out why we behave the way we do, and give us some sense of control over our lives.
A second important element of emotional intelligence is called “self- regulation.” This means being able to control your emotions in situations so that they don’t affect other people or yourself negatively.
This can be difficult, if not impossible, when you are feeling angry, hurt, frustrated, etc. It takes practice, but learning how to regulate your own emotions is an integral part of emotional literacy.
Self-regulation can also help you manage your moods more effectively — for example, by avoiding things that may make you feel bad.
And while it sounds obvious, making sure you have enough sleep and exercise helps keep your mind and body relaxed as well. Emerging research suggests that both mental and physical health depend at least partly on how well individuals cope with stress.
Research has linked low levels of emotional intelligence with higher rates of anxiety, depression, substance abuse, violence, and poor job performance. In fact, one study found that employees who were rated as having high EQ performed better than their peers who weren’t.
So why would we want to develop our emotional skills? Because understanding and managing your feelings is a key component in leading a happy life. And although most of us think we already have some, we really don’t.
Many people lack basic knowledge about emotion and stigma too often surrounds discussion of emotion, which makes it hard to learn how to deal with it properly.
Many people think that being more emotional means to always show how much you care about others. This is not a good way to develop your EI.
This can be detrimental to relationships as well as to yourself. When you put on an act, people may feel used or even fooled.
By limiting yourself to just showing emotions, you lose the ability to be strong outside of relationships.
If you want to improve your emotional intelligence, then have a goal to genuinely enjoy meeting new people every day.
Try talking to different individuals for some length of time to see if they like you and get comfortable with you.
Practice using appropriate tone, expression, and volume of voice when interacting with other people.
Also practice listening to what other people say and respond in a thoughtful manner. By doing this, you will learn a lot about them which could help build trust.
Share your feelings
It is important to recognize that emotional intelligence can be developed at any stage in life. While early adulthood may seem like the most appropriate time to develop these skills, it is not necessarily the best time. The key is finding what works for you – whether it is developing your empathy, understanding anger better, or learning how to say good-bye more gracefully.
There are many ways to improve one’s emotional intelligence. Some of the strategies include practicing acceptance and letting go (of things such as regrets), acknowledging emotions, asking questions, and identifying strengths.
It is also important to understand that emotional intelligence does not change automatically. You have to work on it. Just because someone has never been able to control his or her emotions does not mean that they cannot learn this skill.
Emotional literacy, or knowledge about emotion, is a starting point when trying to strengthen your EQ. Once you have learned some basic concepts, then you can move onto other areas such as recognition and regulation of emotions, motivation, and relationships.
A lot of people get emotional intelligence confused with emotion regulation. While both are important, they are not the same.
Emotion regulation is understanding your emotions and how to manage them. For example, if you’re feeling angry, you can choose to think about why that anger is inappropriate and then try to reduce it or eliminate it altogether.
But being able to recognize and identify your own feelings is another key part of developing your emotional intelligence.
You’d have to be able to say “I am feeling X” before you could work on managing your X-ness.
And while trying to control your emotions is a good thing, being aware of what makes you feel certain types of emotions is also an integral part of this.
Something like fear of failure may make you feel uncomfortable but it’s also a very healthy fear. It’s something we all experience at some time in our lives and too much lack thereof can be a problem.
So learning how to differentiate between those things is an important aspect of EI.
Learn to be assertive
Being able to control your emotions is an important quality for anyone to have. You will likely encounter situations where you are required to keep calm, or even confront someone about something that has hurt them.
By instead of reacting in anger, people who lack emotional intelligence take longer to get over their reaction. This can easily continue into more negative thoughts and feelings which are not productive.
It is very important to learn how to manage your emotions so that they do not affect you too much. Also, being aware of other peoples’ emotions and how they feel about things helps prevent arguments and distractions.
You will find that as you grow in emotional intelligence, your relationships improve and stay stable. People will respect you more and want to connect with you due to your ability to regulate yourself.