As we already discussed, emotional intelligence (or EQ as it is often referred to) can be improved through education and practice. It’s also important to note that there are many ways to develop your empathy, or what some refer to as “soft skills.”

But before you start trying to improve yours, you must first determine where your own limits lie. This article will talk about how to do just that — evaluate your own level of empathizing.

Factors that affect one's emotional intelligence

There are several factors that play a major role in someone’s emotional intelligence.

Some of these factors are internal (in you, the person) such as your own self-esteem and sense of confidence, empathy, how well you understand other people, etc., and external ones such as whether or not you feel safe and secure around others, if you have supportive relationships, etc.

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Overall, being emotionally intelligent means being able to identify and manage your emotions, be aware of the needs and feelings of others, and recognize when something is wrong and need correcting.

Ways to improve one's emotional intelligence

One of the most important things you can work on your EQ is understanding what makes you feel good and why.

This is known as identifying your strengths. We're all different, which means we're all endowed with certain qualities that make us happy or bring out emotions in us.

We're born with some EQ (emotional quotient) traits, like knowing how to use empathy or recognize humor as a tool.

Some people are more likely to be motivated by rewards or incentives, while others are more motivating through praise or acknowledgment.

Taking care of your mental health

One important thing to recognize about emotional intelligence is that it can be learned. Just like with any other skill, you can learn how to manage your emotions and understand what makes you feel good and bad about yourself and others.

It’s not something that someone else could teach you unless they also had experience in managing their own feelings. But there are some things you can do to help you grow your EQ.

You can develop self-awareness by paying attention to how you feel around people and whether you're in a healthy place mentally.

Self-confidence comes from understanding your strengths and learning how to apply them to situations so that you feel confident in yourself. That may mean realizing that you don't have control over everything, but working on trusting yourself more will help you believe in yourself more.

You can also work on being aware of your weaknesses and trying to fix them. This way, you'll keep track of those areas and hopefully improve in the long run.

Running away or ignoring your problems won't make them go away nor will it increase your confidence in yourself.

Mood boards

A mood board is an excellent way to test your emotional intelligence by looking at pictures, materials or experiences that make you feel good, bad, or curious.

Something like putting together a new collection of clothes requires understanding how colors appeal to you and what styles are interesting to look at. Creating a mood board uses this concept applied to emotions.

By taking some time to find out who else has designed using similar images, textures, shapes, and tones, you can use these resources to create your own mood board.

An example of creating a mood board includes finding examples of positive feelings and making changes to them to see what effect they have. For instance, someone could take a picture of their favorite beach and add bright reds in the water and oranges in the sun to create an eye-catching image.

Learning to be calm

A large part of emotional intelligence is being able to control your own emotions. This is called self-control or, more commonly, emotional regulation.

When we are experiencing an emotion, two things happen. One is that our subconscious mind gets this message about something happening in our life, and it can sometimes store those messages very deeply.

The other thing is that all these feelings get stimulated. They may even become stronger than they were before because you added new thoughts and beliefs to them.

So how do you regulate your emotions?

You learn how to down-regulate the body so that they stop changing shape and intensity quickly. You also practice thinking about what has happened already and not letting it influence your actions or future behaviour.

It is like having control over your reactions. And for students, this will help with stress and anxiety when studying. It will also help in work and social settings.

There are many different ways to develop this skill, but the one I want to talk about here uses the theory of mindfulness.

Learning to be patient

When you are impatient, it can easily turn into anger. You may become irritated with someone or something because you cannot handle your emotions.

People who lack emotional intelligence often feel hurt and offended very quickly. They may also take things too seriously and get upset over nothing.

It is important to learn how to be more tolerant of others. Try not to assume bad intentions just because someone did not agree with you.

Practice being able to control your reactions for only a certain amount of time before letting go. Then, try reasoning with the person to see if that helps calm them down.

If it does not work after a few attempts, walk away! Letting go of what doesn’t matter will free up energy you have to focus on other things. Also, keep yourself busy so you do not have time to think about the people around you.

Emotions are a part of life, but they should not determine how you live yours.