How Emotional Intelligence Can Be Learned
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Recent research is showing that emotional intelligence (or EQ as it’s often referred to) can have profound effects on your life, both at work and in your personal life. While some people may feel uncomfortable being labeled as having “good” emotions, many believe that we all have a basic level of empathy built into us.
We are born with this innate ability to relate to other people, but most learn how to suppress, avoid or control these feelings as we grow up.
Removing this barrier can help you achieve your career goals and improve your relationships. In fact, experts claim that developing your EQ could be the key to happiness.
While there are no standardized tests for measuring EQ, researchers do agree that it involves:
Knowing what others are feeling
Understanding why they are feeling the way they are
Identifying their own feelings and how to manage them
Many employers now require employees to take an EQ test as part of hiring. If you’re looking to advance your career, knowing about this important personality trait is never too late.
Factors that affect our emotional intelligence
One of the biggest factors in developing your EQ is understanding what influences your emotions.
What makes you feel good about yourself can make a big difference in how you feel about someone else’s actions. For example, when we are doing well for ourselves, this can sometimes cause us to lose sight of all the hard work that others have done for us.
We may even forget that not everyone has the same opportunities as we do, which makes it harder for them to succeed than it is for us. This can negatively influence their self-confidence and trust in other people.
On the other hand, if they try to tell you how to live your life or give you advice, it can make you feel bad because you don't agree with them.
This comes from them thinking that you don't know enough about the situation, or that you aren't working towards the right goals. If these things hurt your feelings, then it will take its toll on your mental health.
Ways to improve our emotional intelligence
One of the most important things you can do to strengthen your emotional skills is recognize when someone else is experiencing an emotion and what that emotion is.
This is called identifying a person’s emotions. You should be able to identify at least three reasons why someone may be feeling a certain way and understand how they are influenced by their emotions.
It is very common to feel bad after something happened, but before you take action, you must consider whether this will make them feel even worse or if there is anything you can do to prevent these negative feelings from happening.
For example, if a friend finds out about a breakup through a source other than yourself, then it would be best to try to avoid them until she has had time to process her feelings. This way, she does not have to deal with both endings simultaneously.
A large part of emotional intelligence is being aware of your emotions. This includes knowing what you are feeling, understanding why you are feeling a certain way, and taking appropriate action to address those feelings.
Practicing mindfulness can be very helpful in this area. By practicing mindfulness, you will learn how to recognize and understand your emotions more clearly.
Mindfulness comes from Buddhism and was originally designed to help people focus on doing one thing at a time with excellence.
Since then, it has been adapted to help individuals deal with other things as well. One of the main concepts of mindfulness is non-judgmental awareness. You have to be able to acknowledge and accept yourself just as you are before you can work on changing anything else.
There are several different ways to practice mindfulness. Some people prefer meditation, others use yoga or chi (or spiritual) exercises, and still others choose to do something they call “mindful exercise”.
Whatever method you choose, make sure it is for you and that you will actually keep up with it.
Understand your emotions
A large part of emotional intelligence is understanding your own emotions. You can learn how to do this by practicing self-awareness, which means paying attention to what you are doing, what people around you are doing, and what feelings you have about these things.
When we are not aware of our emotions, they can take over control of us and influence all sorts of other behaviors. For example, if you feel angry most of the time, then that anger will probably get channeled into something like taking revenge or acting aggressively towards others because you feel threatened by them.
If you frequently feel tired, you may stop engaging in activities as much because you don’t feel motivated. Or you might avoid going out with friends because you don’t want to deal with anything more than just hanging out at home.
With EI, there are ways to manage those emotions and promote wellness. By being able to recognize and understand your emotions, you can work to reduce their intensity and frequency. You also can use your emotions to motivate yourself to do things you need to do.
For instance, if you were trying to lose weight, you could recognize a feeling of hunger and try to find reasons why eating food would be good for you.
Make good use of your feelings
It is important to know how to manage your emotions. When you are feeling emotional, make sure to take some time to yourself before interacting with other people so that you can recover from the conversation you just had.
This also applies if you need to put off having this conversation until later because it made you feel bad at the moment. Save some time for yourself by taking a break away from work or home to have some quiet time.
If someone has done something hurtful to you, give them space and understand that they may not be aware of the effect their actions have on you.
Do not bottle up your anger, instead discuss what happened with friends or family to help ease the tension. Also try talking about things that may make you feel better such as hobbies or events in the area where you live.
Emotions connect us to each other and shape who we are as individuals.
Know when to be emotional and when to be rational
Even more important than knowing how to use your emotions is being able to control yours. You don’t have to feel every feeling, but you should know what normal feelings are so that you can recognize them when they occur.
When you don’t understand why you’re feeling a certain way or youcan’t seem to tamp down your emotions, it becomes harder to regulate your own behavior and affect those around you.
Research has shown that people who are able to manage their emotions are less likely to develop mental health conditions such as anxiety or depression.
They also tend to do better in school and work and enjoy their relationships more. In other words, they live happier lives.
Be honest with your peers
As mentioned before, EQ is more than just knowing what to say in difficult situations. It’s also about being able to identify how you make other people feel, as well as recognize when someone else does not like or appreciate you and why.
This could be because of something you said or did, or because they think you are different from them, or because it is simply because they do not like you.
No one is immune to having their feelings hurt, but we can learn how to manage our own emotions and those of others. And yes, this goes both for students and teachers!
If you ever noticed that some people never seem quite happy, it may be due to low emotional intelligence (EI). They are always busy, stressed out, and unhappy.
Conversely, there are many individuals who are consistently smiling and enjoying life. These people have high EI.
Why should you care? Because you want to be liked and understood, and you would like to enjoy this experience yourself. Your colleagues and friends will too, if you are aware of your strengths and weaknesses and work to improve yours.
Speak with your partner about your emotions
It is important to recognize that you do not have to feel strong or in control of your feelings at all times.
This can be very difficult when life gets tough, which it will for everyone from time to time.
The thing about humans is we tend to think that we are special, but we’re not. We’re just like every other animal, really. We get hungry, we need sleep, and we feel things.
It’s what we do with our hunger, sleep, and feelings that make us who we are.
So how does someone learn how to manage their own emotions? By learning more about themselves and their emotions!
By becoming aware of their emotions they can work towards better understanding of them. They can also learn how to regulate their emotional responses and apply this to daily situations.
There are many different types of EI (or ‘emotional intelligence’ as some call it) tests out there. Some focus on measuring one specific aspect of emotion such as anger management, while others look at overall empathy or even situational awareness.
Whatever test you pick, remember that each one is valid. While some people may have more systematic ways of thinking than others, that doesn’t mean they don’t experience emotions.