Recent developments in psychology have focused on emotional intelligence (EI). This is not to say that earlier theories about personality were not related to emotions, but it was considered less important than cognitive ability.

Emotions such as anger, compassion, gratitude, and so forth play an integral part in helping us function socially and at work.

In fact, having high levels of EI can make all the difference when it comes to success. Some studies even suggest that people who are more intelligent also tend to be higher in emotional quotient (ability to recognize, process, and regulate your own feelings) — which could help explain why some very smart individuals sometimes seem “cold” or "hard-boiled".

It's worth noting here that although there is a relationship between IQ and EQ, they do not correlate with each other heavily. That means you can easily have lots of one without much of the other, and vice versa.

This article will go into detail on what defines emotional intelligence and how you can improve yours. It will also discuss some situations where low emotional literacy can become a problem.

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The key elements of emotional intelligence

In general, EQ is defined as the ability to recognize, understand, and manage your own emotions; identify those of others; and use these feelings to motivate yourself and them.

However, there are several different theories about what makes up individual levels of EQ. Some say it’s related to IQ, while other researchers believe it has little to do with cognitive processes and more to do with personality traits.

No matter which theory you agree with, however, all experts seem to agree that being emotionally intelligent isn’t just having good self-control, it’s something much deeper than that.

Develop your self-awareness

One of the most important things that can help you develop your emotional intelligence is understanding yourself. This includes knowing what makes you feel happy, sad, angry, or stressed out.

It also means being aware of your strengths and weaknesses as well as how to use them. For example, someone with low emotional regulation may get so excited about something that they forget to calm down later.

People who have high emotional control are usually able to regulate their emotions more quickly. They may talk at a faster speed, use humor to deal with situations, and understand how past experiences affect current feelings.

While it’s easy to think you don’t have much emotion regulation ability, research shows that having certain skills can be developed. There are strategies such as mindfulness, practicing relaxation, thinking about reasons for having limits on anger, and using words to describe your feelings.

Develop your self-control

A recent definition of emotional intelligence comes from Daniel Goleman, author of “Emotional Intelligence” and other bestsellers such as “Working With Emotions” and “Facing Life’s Challenges.” He defines it as the ability to recognize our own emotions and those of others, to be able to regulate them, and to use these skills to achieve our goals.

With regard to regulation, he notes that we sometimes get distracted by thoughts or feelings about something before we do something. For example, if you want to stop drinking alcohol, you may start thinking about all of the things you will miss when you go out or what people might say to you when they find out you are quitting.

This can make you feel bad enough to keep drinking, so you postpone the decision to quit. It is also possible to have negative feelings without necessarily acting on them. You could think about how much time you spend watching TV and then decide not to watch it anymore, but still stay up late because you cannot sleep.

Both of these examples show that someone with high emotional control would avoid distractions and actions that may lead to a bad outcome before taking action. They would consider the consequences of their decisions ahead of time.

In his book, Goleman says that one of the most important reasons individuals succeed or fail is their perception of their personal effectiveness.

Develop your social awareness

Social intelligence is defined as our ability to understand other people’s behaviors, motivations, and emotions.

Social skills are also referred to as non-verbal or emo­tional competencies. These include things like understanding how others feel, reading body language, and knowing when to take advantage of someone’s emotional state to get what you want.

When it comes to emotional quotient (EQ), no one has total control over their feelings except for themselves. Other people can make us feel good or bad, and there's nothing we can do about that.

However, we can learn some strategies for controlling our own reactions to them and helping them regulate theirs. This, in turn, will help keep relations healthy.

Develop your relationship skills

A lot of people believe that emotional intelligence is just about being able to read someone’s emotions and respond appropriately, but this definition leaves out an important part of EQ – developing our relationships.

This can be tricky if you don’t know how to motivate yourself or others when they are trying to get you to do something. It also means knowing what kind of attitude to have towards other people — not only individuals who may need your help with their moods, but groups and institutions as well.

In fact, one of the biggest predictors of success is having positive interactions with people around you. In general, people who enjoy the company of others are more successful than those who don’t.

So why not try to develop your own EQ by learning how to relate to other people? You will find it helpful for career success, family life, and even self-confidence.

Diversify your assets

A lot of people believe that emotional intelligence is just about being able to read other people’s emotions, but this definition leaves out one very important factor: yourself.

Your own feelings matter!

You have to feel things for others to be able to read them. If you don’t feel anything when someone else does, then you won’t be able to recognize their reactions.

This can make it hard to connect with other people, which obviously isn’t good. You need to feel something to form relationships.

Emotional intelligence includes how well you understand your own feelings and why you feel a certain way. This makes it easier to relate to other people and manage your own moods and stress levels.

It also helps you deal with setbacks more effectively because you are less likely to give up if you understand what could possibly cause your failure.

There are many ways to develop your emotional intelligence, including through learning and practicing new skills such as emotion recognition or mindfulness. Some experts even say that developing EQ is an all-consuming process that never really ends.

So while starting from zero is easy, staying motivated long term may be a challenge.

Fortunately, there are some tools you can use to help. For example, you can learn how to be happier and better cope with life by changing your lifestyle, giving yourself rewards, using motivation strategies, and doing fun activities.

Be honest with your peers

As we know, emotional intelligence (or EQ as it is sometimes referred to) plays an important role in successful relationships. When you are aware of how other people feel, what they want, and if they are happy or not, then you can better understand them and avoid hard times.

In fact, a recent study found that having high levels of empathy is one of the most predictive characteristics of happiness in life. That means being able to identify what makes someone else laugh, why someone else may be feeling down, and understanding why someone else would get involved in something is very valuable.

Emotions connect us together, so being able to recognize them and relate to them goes a long way towards building trust and friendship. It also helps you understand who you are working with and whether they will keep their promises to you.

So what does all this have to do with leadership?

Well, research shows that having higher levels of emotional intelligence is linked to higher leader effectiveness. This includes things like greater engagement, motivation of others, lower employee turnover, and improved communication and relationship skills.

On the other hand, studies show that low levels of emotional intelligence can hurt leadership performance by making employees distrust leaders and believe that everything under the sun is just for getting ahead at the expense of others.

Emily Cook already mentioned above that emotions play a big part in leading. But knowing how to manage yours and those around you is even more crucial.

Be honest with your peers with

Emotion Quotient (EQ) is defined as “the ability to recognize, understand, manage, and utilize emotions for one’s own mental and physical well-being.”

That sounds pretty good, right? But what does that mean?

Well, it means being aware of how you feel about things and taking appropriate action based on those feelings. For example, if someone makes you angry, try to figure out why they made you that way and address the issue at its source. If someone breaks up with you, think about what you could have done better to keep them in your life and learn from their mistakes.

If you see something happening that might hurt another person, intervene before anything bad happens.