How To Improve Your Emotional Intelligence
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Over the past few years, emotional intelligence (or EQ for short) has become one of the most popular psychological theories in the world. In fact, many claim it is now more important than IQ.
Many employers look at EQ as an essential requirement for workplace success. A growing body of research suggests that people with higher EQ are happier and healthier individuals — they tend to do better socially, work effectively with others, and achieve their goals.
This can have significant benefits for them and those around them. For example, researchers have linked high levels of EQ with lower rates of depression and stress-related health conditions like anxiety and hypertension.
It also seems to play a role in helping us cope with loss and suffering – something we’re sure to encounter at some time or other.
So what makes someone have higher EQ? And how can you improve yours?
Emotional quotient and personality traits
Just like there are smarts or intelligence, there is also a cluster of skills called emotional intelligence. Like IQ, these depend on your personal psychology and experiences, but go beyond that.
Some theorists describe EQ as the ability to recognize, understand, and manage your own emotions as well as the emotions of others. This includes being able to differentiate between different types of emotion, and using this knowledge to strengthen relationships and motivate yourself.
Share your experiences
Developing your emotional intelligence is not just about learning how to recognize emotions in others, it’s also about recognizing your own emotions and what makes you feel them.
This can be tricky at times because we all have different levels of awareness when it comes to our feelings.
Some people seem to know exactly why they are feeling a certain way even before they tell themselves or someone else, while other people may play down their feelings or try to ignore them.
It can take us a little while to realize that something isn’t working for us and so we keep trying to make it work, which only adds more pressure.
That doesn’t help anyone but ourselves so there is a time to say goodbye and start looking for better opportunities.
If you're ever in a situation where you think your job might be ending, you should probably begin thinking about your future career moves.
A lot of theories about emotional intelligence focus too much on having strong emotions, which is only part of it. You also need to be able to control your reactions to those emotions and use that knowledge to make smart decisions.
If you cannot regulate your own emotions then what hope do you have for managing someone else’s? In fact, many believe that people who are good at controlling their emotions are actually bad bosses because they can’t deal with other people well.
So, whether you consider yourself to have low or high emotional intelligence, don’t expect instant changes. It will take work, and not every person will agree with you anyway.
That said, there are things you can do to improve yours. And while this may seem like an odd reminder, we think you should know this already.
But before you start trying to change anything, you must first acknowledge that changing something is difficult.
Be honest with your peers
As mentioned before, one of the important things that can boost emotional intelligence is being able to identify what emotions others are feeling. This is called empathic or understanding other people.
By using social skills such as making friends, interacting with people in general, and keeping an eye out for signs of emotion in others, you will find it easier to understand how someone else might be feeling.
It’s also worth noting that while most people think they have limited empathy, even those who claim not to actually do. Because we all have our own personal experiences, we assume that if someone seems angry or hurt, then they must feel that way because of something bad that happened to them.
However, there could be many reasons why that person may feel this way including something that has nothing to do with us at all. If you don’t know what caused their pain, try to figure it out by looking into their lives, asking questions, and showing interest in them.
Be honest with your peers with
I’m sure you’ve heard people talk about emotional intelligence (EI) before, but you may not know what it actually is or how to improve yours. What makes this more complicated is there are several theories about what EI really is.
Some say it’s having strong emotions that help you accomplish things — helping you achieve your goals. Others think being able to control your own emotions means you have mastered self-regulation, which helps you focus and relax. Still others believe it’s something separate from emotion – like understanding why someone else feels certain ways.
No matter which theory sounds best to you, we can all agree on one thing: developing our emotional skills is important. In today’s world, where relationships seem to get increasingly complex, mastering your emotions is an essential life skill.
Listen to others closely
One of the biggest keys to emotional intelligence is being able to listen to people and understand what they are saying.
Many times we get so focused on our own lives that we don’t pay attention to what other people have going on. This can be tricky, because sometimes things do not seem like they're going well for them and they may feel like they're in a bad place, but there could be something else going on.
You need to learn how to recognize these signs and add some extra credit by being compassionate and understanding.
It will make your life much more harmonious and happier.
Reading between the lines and picking up on non-verbal cues can help you achieve this. You should also ask questions and try to find out why someone might be feeling a certain way.
This will take practice, but it will pay off in the end.
Don’t be egotistical
One of the biggest reasons why people lose motivation in life is because they get distracted by their own success or failure. If you are constantly thinking about how well you are doing, then it can become difficult to motivate yourself to do something less successful.
This goes both ways for others. When you are trying to help someone else achieve his/her goal, there can be feelings of jealousy or resentment if you feel that person is not doing as much as you could have done.
Instead of focusing on what you did, focus more on helping the other person succeed. This will inspire them to keep working hard as well.
You can also avoid being overly helpful by looking at your friend's or family member's success with envy instead of inspiration.
Most people have a tendency to think that they are more intelligent than other people, or at least that they know better than others what is going on in their lives. This can become an issue if these individuals make decisions that affect other people, or if they assume that because they know something it means that everyone else does as well.
Emotional intelligence (or EQ for short) refers to how effectively you manage your emotions, and this applies not only to yourself but also to others. If you're able to recognize and understand someone's emotional state, you can help them feel less stressed by identifying what makes them happy and helping them achieve that. You can also tell when someone is feeling down and work to cheer them up or give them advice so that they don't carry their feelings around with them.
"I've seen plenty of examples where someone's emotional intelligence was off the charts, but they made bad decisions due to lack of self-awareness," says Dr. Singer. "Someone who thinks they always know best may put themselves before others.
Learn to laugh
A lot of people get very stressed out about life. They are overwhelmed with everything they have to do, and feel that there is never enough time to complete all of their tasks.
When you are in such a state of stress, your emotions can become very volatile. You may be angry or frustrated most of the time, which could hurt relationships close to you.
It’s important to learn how to control your emotional responses to situations. When you are able to regulate your emotions, it helps you to stay more calm and relaxed.
You will also need to understand what causes your feelings and why you feel the way you do. This helps you identify the factors leading up to your negative emotions, and means you don’t give much weight to things that don’t really matter to you.
There are many different ways to improve your emotional intelligence. One of the easiest ways to do this is by learning how to laugh.
Why should I learn how to laugh?
By adding laughter into your daily routine, you can achieve several goals at the same time. These include:
Boosting your mood
Building strong friendships
Improving your self-confidence
Acquiring new skills
Learning something new
Getting rid of shyness
Writing down reasons to start laughing every day can help motivate you to actually do so.