How To Increase Emotional Intelligence In Relationships
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Recent studies have shown that emotional intelligence (“EI”) is one of the most important skills people can develop. In fact, there are several theories about why it is so crucial to human happiness.
Some believe that having high EI makes you happier because you understand other people and how they feel. You know what buttons to press when trying to get someone to agree with you or do something for you.
Others think that being smart about emotions helps you manage your own feelings and motivate yourself to perform certain tasks.
Yet another theory suggests that people who have higher EI learn similar strategies from experiences in relationships, which help them maintain healthy romantic ties.
All three reasons sound like good things to strive for! But before you can increase your EI, you need to know what the term means. And since there are different definitions, we will also discuss the differences between the types of EI.
This article will try to give you all the tips you need to boost your relationship EQ — I hope you enjoy reading it.
Make eye contact
Looking into someone’s eyes is one of the most powerful ways to connect with them, and it’s free! All you have to do is look at each other for two seconds and there you go – connection!
Eye contact can help you convey your emotions, show respect, build trust, understand what others are saying, and more. When used effectively, it can strengthen relationships — even strong ones.
But making eye contact isn’t always easy when feelings get high or conversations become heated. This can be especially true in romantic settings, where intimacy is sought after.
That’s why it's important to develop your emotional intelligence (EI) in relationships. You can do this by practicing how to recognize and manage your own emotions, as well as those of others.
Here are some tips for increasing relationship EI that may help you enjoy greater closeness with your partners, friends, family members, and colleagues. Read on to learn more about these strategies.
Consistency is one of the most important things when it comes to relationships. This could be with how you interact with your partner, parents, siblings, friends, and even yourself.
Relationships are constantly changing so it makes sense that what kind of behaviors you’re practicing in this area would change too.
It can get really tough at times. You may feel like you have done all you can for a while, but then something happens and you say or do something that brings up past feelings which are also new emotions.
At these moments, your emotional intelligence will need to work fast.
You will have to figure out what is going on and why this is happening before you can fix it.
This article will talk about some ways to increase your relationship EQ through consistency.
When it comes down to it, being able to relate to your partner as an equal requires that you be real with them. If you are constantly putting up fake smiles or trying too hard to seem like the most intelligent person in the room, then you will never feel confident around your significant other.
Relationship experts say that if you cannot laugh at yourself then you will not be able to motivate others to have fun with you. A good sense of humor is a key part of emotional intelligence and without it, you will suffer greatly.
If you can’t accept things less than perfect about yourself, you will probably struggle to appreciate the same qualities in someone else. You must believe in yourself to truly understand how important you are to everyone else.
Running away from who you are and what makes you happy won’t help anyone but you. Being more authentic will win you many admirers and even some friends, which is always nice.
Share your emotions
In relationships, emotional intelligence (or EQ for short) is what helps you perceive and understand other people’s emotions. It also makes it possible for you to predict how they will feel next so that you can take action or avoid actions based on their responses.
The more you know about someone else’s feelings, the better able they are to read yours. This creates trust, stability and understanding in your relationship.
When you try to ignore, suppress or numb your own feelings, you end up hurting both yourself and others. You may lose motivation, run out of things to do and be less productive at work or home.
You may even become totally distracted from your responsibilities because you don’t have time to process your thoughts and feelings. Your loved ones may start to notice changes in you and your interactions with them.
Some signs that your emotional intelligence has taken a nosedive include if you are frequently annoyed by something said or done by your partner, if you find it difficult to laugh or smile, and if you seem preoccupied most of the time.
If these symptoms sound familiar, then it's time to improve your emotional quotient. Here are some tips to get you started...
Listen to others closely
When you are in a relationship, it is important to be aware of what your partner is saying, as well as how they are acting towards you and other people.
It can be difficult to tune into their innermost thoughts and feelings when they seem fine at home but then go off about something else outside the house.
Tone of voice, body language, and things said all have an effect on someone around them, so being ableawareof these things will help you understand your significant other better.
Become more attentive, ask questions, and look for clues- if none exist, at least you tried!
You may also want to consider looking into couples counseling or therapy to see if this is necessary for your happiness.
Don’t be egotistical
In your relationships, you must make an effort to focus on what makes your partner special instead of only talking about yourself. This is particularly important if they have done something good for you or made you feel happy before but now you feel like their constant talker-self.
If you noticed them listening to music that they enjoy, ask if they liked it and why. If you saw them looking beautiful, compliment them (and don’t overdo it – “You look very pretty!”).
This doesn’t mean to go into rambling self-praise sessions, but try to use these opportunities to show how much you care by speaking about them rather than just telling them who you are.
It will take some work, but this will help develop your relationship. You will learn how to pay more attention to others, which is a key part of emotional intelligence.
We are all different, which means we will always have things that make us feel good and things that don’t. This is okay! It is what makes us who we are.
But when you learn how to manage your emotions, it helps you do some pretty amazing things. You can control your reactions to situations, and this changes your perception of them.
By being more aware of yourself and other people, you can improve relationships.
And while there is no “magic pill” for emotional intelligence, there are several strategies you can use to boost yours. Here are six easy ways to be happier with yourself and others.
Be More Positive
This seems obvious, but too many people struggle with negative thoughts. When you're thinking about something, you'll probably find yourself dwelling on negatives or at least adding little bumps into the equation.
Negative thoughts may seem motivating at first, but they can hurt you later. Over time, they can weaken your self-confidence and push you into a slump.
Instead of letting these thoughts grow, try replacing them with positive ones. Focus on what you like about the situation, ask yourself if there's anything you can change about it, and think about rewards you could get from the outcome.
Start building up a mental list of those rewards and using them as motivation.
Avoid comparing yourself to others, because that only puts pressure on yourself.
It’s easy for us to get distracted by all of the things we want or need from someone, but staying focused on them is the best way to strengthen your relationship.
When you make a commitment to be with someone, you should expect that they will ask questions about yourself. They may try to test what you are saying by doing or asking something- anything!
That’s okay though because it shows how invested they are in you. If they didn’t care enough to look into who you were before, then why would they now?
By being honest with each other, you show respect and trust which are key relationships ingredients. Being able to identify those traits in others is one of the major strengths of emotional intelligence.
If you don’t think you have much EQ then start practicing. Ask people close to you whether they feel you understand their feelings and if you do, help them work through them.
The better you are at understanding emotions, the easier it will be to recognize and manage your own. And once you learn how to manage your own, then you can teach those same skills to someone else.
Relationship experts say that having high levels of empathy is an important part of a healthy bond so trying to relate to the thoughts and feelings of others is worth investing time in.