How To Work On Your Emotional Intelligence


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Over the past few years, emotional intelligence (“EI”) has become one of the most popular workplace qualities in America. People are talking about it, teaching it, and investing in training courses that focus on it.
Many employers now require employees to have adequate levels of EI as part of their job responsibilities. A growing number of companies even promote it as an important leadership quality for managers to possess.
Emotional quotient or EQ is another term used to describe this concept of understanding your own emotions and those of others. This kind of self-awareness helps you deal with difficult situations more effectively and keeps relationships healthy.
While some people may think that having high EQ means being able to enjoy a good laugh every once in a while, research shows that it goes beyond just that. Having higher EQ actually correlates with a variety of positive outcomes, from lower stress to improved academic performance to greater productivity.
It also seems to play a significant role in creating effective leaders. After all, successful bosses know how to motivate and inspire their staff, they manage their own emotions well, and they understand the importance of keeping relationships strong at work.
This article will talk you through eight easy ways to improve your emotional intelligence. You don’t need any special equipment or skills — anyone can do these things!
1. Become aware of your strengths and weaknesses
One way to increase your emotional intelligence is to recognize your strengths and weaknesses.
Have patience
Working on your emotional intelligence takes time, but you will get better as you practice. This may mean investing in a yoga class or meditation session once a week, trying out different strategies, and giving it a few months to see results.
It can be difficult at first, but stick with it! Once you have made an effort to work on your EI, you will notice changes for the better.
You will feel happier, more relaxed, and even healthier overall. In fact, a recent study conducted by The University of Chicago found that people who practiced mindfulness (working on their emotional intelligence) were less likely to suffer from mental health conditions like anxiety and depression than those who didn’t.
Make eye contact
A recent study suggests that making direct, meaningful eye contact with people can help you develop your emotional intelligence (EI). Developing your EI is important because strong interpersonal relationships depend on it.
When we are not in touch with our emotions, they control us. Without emotional regulation, someone may spend hours taking out their anger or frustration on others, or be unable to recognize when things are off track and need fixing before things get worse.
It’s also possible to lose sight of what matters in life by ignoring your feelings. This could affect how well you perform at work and in other areas of your life like family relations.
Making eye contact helps you understand what another person wants and needs from you, and gives them an opportunity to see that you are paying attention to them. It also shows that you are interested in their thoughts and feelings, which makes them more likely to share information with you.
You can easily add this skill to yours if you don’t have much experience with it already. Here’s what to do.
Be realistic
Working on your emotional intelligence doesn’t mean developing your ability to be emotionally in control all of the time, it means learning how to regulate your emotions so that they don’t affect you too much.
It also means knowing what causes you to get emotional and trying to avoid or reduce those triggers. For example, if you are constantly listening to music you feel passionate about, then why not try investing in some quieter songs?
Alternatively, find something else you enjoy doing and learn from it! If you like watching movies, start studying psychology behind acting and movie making. You could even consider becoming an actor or filmmaker yourself!
On the other hand, if you love reading, take up writing as a way to release more positive energy. Or better still, study literature or psychology – both of which emphasize emotion and understanding of others.
Share your experiences
Developing your emotional intelligence is not just about knowing how to recognize emotions in others, it’s also about understanding your own feelings.
This can be tricky at times because we sometimes feel angry with ourselves for something that happened or you may feel sad because of what someone did to you.
It’t easy to identify all the reasons why you are feeling a certain way but thinking about yourself in relation to other people’s situations can help. For example, if someone else has done something that made you feel bad, ask yourself whether they got enough credit for their good qualities.
If so, then maybe they didn’t do anything wrong after all? It might be you who misjudged them. This could apply to things like worries that you carried around which didn’t seem to go away even when you thought you were ‘winning’.
We often think that we’re the only one who feels this way, but there’s always at least one person who isn’t totally immune to the same thing.
Be honest with your peers
As mentioned before, one of the biggest reasons why people get into bad relationships is because they are not able to relate to someone else. You may feel like you have to hide how you feel about something or person so that they do not see it.
If this is you then maybe it’s time to let go and learn how to be more open. It will take some practice but hopefully you’ll find yourself enjoying those friendships much more than you do now.
By being able to relate to others and understand their emotions, you’ll also gain knowledge about other people which can only help you in life. This goes both ways though- you should expect to be judged too for what you say and do!
Your friends might tell you things they have never told anyone before so be ready for that. Try talking to them honestly to see if that changes. If it does, great; keep sharing these secrets!
If it doesn’t change anything then at least you know where you stand and can move forward from there. Don’t worry about hurting their feelings either – sometimes that takes a bit longer to happen.
Everyone has feelings and no one is immune to having a loss or breaking up just because they don’t seem to ‘connect�’ with you.
Listen to others closely
Even if you’re not sure what they are talking about, try to understand how their tone, body language, and expression affect them. Watch how they respond to other people – is there ever a time when they aren’t paying attention?
By doing these things, you can learn a lot about emotional intelligence.
If it’s something that really bothers or interests you, you may be able to contribute by practicing your own skills.
Running through scenarios in your mind will help you know just how much power your mental processes have over yourself and others.
Practice listening with focus, understanding the context, and being aware of non-verbal cues. You might even find some tips and tricks for improving your own EQ!
Disclaimer: This article should never replace professional medical advice. But maybe this information can inspire you to do something productive you’ve been putting off? If you feel motivated to improve your emotional literacy, start small and keep learning.
Don’t be egotistical
One of the biggest reasons why people lose motivation in life is because they are always thinking about how much they know or how good they are at something.
The more you focus on yourself, the less motivated you become. This can have disastrous effects as your lack of motivation spreads to other areas.
You may stop trying hard in things that matter to you – like spending time with friends, family, colleagues and so on. You may even give up working altogether.
By staying focused on what you do not feel capable of doing, you create an empty space inside you which cannot be filled. It becomes a hole that takes away important energy from you.
This negative effect will only get stronger as you age, especially if you don’t take care of your mental health.
If you find yourself becoming cynical or depressed, it’s worth looking into whether emotional intelligence has been trained in your brain.
Be humble
Sometimes we get so focused on being intelligent that we forget what really matters. We lose sight of things such as friendship, compassion, and empathy. These are all important qualities in life and work.
Having emotional intelligence (or EQ for short) is like having a tool box full of skills. You’re not trying to feel something or understand something else, you’re just using your EQ skill to do it.
That makes sense, doesn’t it? If you can read then you have an IQ test in this field!
But here’s the thing about emotion – they’re always going to be there. Even if everything else was totally wiped from your memory, even if you never learned how to read or write, emotions will still exist.
So why would you want to use your EQ to eliminate them? Why would you want to be completely cold and un-feeling when other people aren’t feeling well, or when someone has done something bad to you?
Humility means acknowledging that you don’t know everything, and that no one does. It means knowing that there are some things out there that are beyond your control and therefore, you can’t fix them.
And sometimes, staying quiet and letting others talk puts you in a better position to help them.