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Emotions are an integral part of our daily lives. They motivate us, inspire us, hurt us, and sometimes make us do crazy things.
We feel emotions when we listen to music or watch a movie. We feel them while reading a book or watching a show. We feel them while talking to someone or about something.
Emotions come in different forms and can be categorized into two main types: positive and negative. Happiness, sadness, anger, disgust, fear, hope—these are some examples of emotion qualities.
People who have high emotional intelligence (“EI”) use their emotions effectively and manage their feelings better than others do. This may sound like a cliché, but it’s true!
There are several theories about what makes people think they have higher EI than they actually do. However, no one theory has convinced all experts that it is correct.
What does matter, though, is that there are skills you can learn to improve your EI. You can work on your attention, understanding, management, and utilization of your own emotions as well as other people’s.
In this article, you will find out more about the importance of having emotional intelligence, how to test yours, and ways to develop it.
Held against academic success, emotional intelligence has become increasingly important in today’s society. More and more employers look for it in new hires.
Relationship to happiness
Over the past decade, emotional intelligence (or EQ) has become one of the most popular psychology theories. Emotions have long been considered integral parts of human experience, so it makes sense that we would want to learn how to manage them.
Some theorists describe EQ as the ability to recognize, understand and control your own emotions as well as those of others. Others suggest that being emotionally intelligent is simply knowing what your own feelings are and how to use them productively towards yourself and others.
Most experts agree that developing your overall IQ does not necessarily translate into higher EQ. Having high levels of empathy requires understanding other people’s thoughts and experiences, which comes down to having good intuition and knowledge of different personality types.
However, there are some studies that link greater EQ with more positive mental health outcomes. These include lower rates of anxiety and depression, improved relationships and work environments, and longer life spans.
One reason for this correlation is that happier individuals may be better at recognizing and responding to other peoples’ negative moods. This helps avoid arguments or hurt feelings in the future.
Another possibility is that happy people tend to make and keep friends more easily. People often talk about feeling connected to others after experiencing certain milestones together, such as when they were married or had children.
Consistently showing affection and interest in the things and people important to someone can help build these strong connections.
How can you improve your emotional intelligence?
First, recognize that there are other people out here with their own emotions, and they’re not all the same as yours.
This is an important concept because it helps you understand why someone else might feel angry or hurt about something that has nothing to do with you.
It also reminds you that some people may not like or respect you, which can make them show their feelings towards you more openly.
At times, these things can be hard to deal with, but if you learn how to manage your own emotions, then you will have a better chance of succeeding in life.
Speak with your peers
A lot of people have a hard time understanding how to motivate someone else. They feel that if they can’t figure out what motivates you, then they cannot use those motivations in their own life.
This is not true at all! In fact, it could be one of the most important things you do for yourself as an individual.
By learning about other people’s strengths and motivating factors, you grow your emotional intelligence. You learn how to relate to others more effectively and strengthen supportive relationships.
You also learn how to recognize when someone needs help motivated or demotivated, which helps you in everyday situations. This goes beyond just colleagues- this applies to friends, family, and even strangers!
Speaking with members of your peer group who are like you in some way can give you insights into why different strategies work for them and what doesn’t.
Emotional intelligence (or EQ as it is often referred to) comes down to you being aware of your emotions, and how those emotions affect others.
This seems simple enough, but there are many things in our lives that can get very emotional. For example, when something bad happens, we may become angry or hurt. Or, if someone does something good, we may feel happy for them.
But what if they do something else later? What if they say some mean things to you right after the first event?
With emotional intelligence, you would be able to recognize such situations and know the best way to deal with them. You’d understand that by complaining about the situation, it will only make it worse.
So instead, you could think about ways to put the other person’s actions into perspective. How much did they really care about you at this time?
By thinking about these types of questions, you’ll find that most people don’t matter all that much to you. It’s easy to move on from their mistakes.
That said, however, one mistake might still hurt you. So you should consider whether it was worth the pain you felt before letting it go.
If you have low emotional intelligence, then you may not realize how much power your own feelings have over other people.
A recent study suggests that people who practice mindfulness, or conscious awareness of present moment experiences, show higher emotional intelligence (EI) than those who do not. Mindfulness is simply paying attention to what you are doing at this very moment- your mind- whether it be listening to music, looking out the window, talking to someone, or practicing yoga.
It sounds simple enough, but practicing mindfulness can have powerful effects on your mental health. It has been linked to lower stress levels, better focus, happier moods, and improved sleep.
There are many ways to learn how to meditate. Some suggest sitting with your feet planted and being aware of each part of your body as they shift position. Others use a gentle breathing technique before focusing on their breath or a word or phrase.
Whatever method you choose, just start small and try once a week! Most adults need only five minutes of formal mediation every day to see benefits. Start there and then slowly build up time until you find an appropriate length for you.
Connect with others
Emotions are powerful, so when you can control them, they help you achieve your goals and make life more pleasant.
People have different personality types, which determine how they process emotions. Some people use direct confrontation to reduce their stress levels while other people may choose to avoid such confrontations because that is their style.
If you're someone who prefers to work alone, then it can be hard to connect with others. You may feel stressed when you need to talk about things or meet for lunch but there's no one else around to do it for you.
By developing your emotional intelligence (EI), you will realize that not everyone shares the same personal styles. This could lead to helping each other in working through issues and changing strategies if needed.
You can develop your EI by practicing using emotion to your advantage. For example, instead of ignoring your feelings, learn how to recognize and manage your emotions.
There are many ways to improve your emotional literacy. You can take classes at school or community centers, read books, listen to talks, and explore apps and tools that promote this.
Be honest with your peers
As mentioned earlier, emotional intelligence (or EQ for short) is having control over your own emotions and understanding of other people’s emotions. Being able to recognize and understand what makes someone else feel good or bad can help you gain their trust and cooperation in an effort to achieve a common goal.
People are usually aware of their own feelings, but understanding others’ inner workings is not as easy. When they do something that makes them feel bad, try to figure out why it made them feel that way and if there was anything more underlying causing the feeling. This could be something like hurting their dignity by saying hurtful things, failing to respect their personal space, or refusing to acknowledge who they are as a person.
It might also be because they lost their temper and said or done something they regret. Sometimes, just like about anyone else, people get hungry, thirsty, or tired and act without thinking first. All of these things are natural human behaviors that don’t require any special insight into emotion.
But when such thoughts or actions are outside of normal behavior, it's important to know what caused them so that you can avoid similar situations in the future.
Hold your hands
Holding your own space, being aware of what surrounds you, and making sure to keep an open dialogue with others are some key components in how to hold your own personal space.
This is especially important if someone else close to you does not agree with something or feels overwhelmed by a situation.
By showing them that they matter and their feelings are valid, you will help them feel more relaxed and able to control their emotions.
It also helps promote trust between people.”
Emotional intelligence (EI) can be described as the ability to identify and manage one's emotions, along with the ability to use these emotions to achieve one's goals.
In fact, research has shown that it is a better predictor of success than IQ!
But developing emotional intelligence isn’t easy. It takes work, practice, and effort.